Gift ideas for the new mom that you might never have considered

Lately I've been thinking about some gift ideas that I wish I had thought of before having my baby. Things that usually don't end up on the registry or that maybe I had a moment of thinking about, but would never have asked for. But in hindsight, let's be real, sometimes asking for those things is better than saying, "I'm not really sure, so get whatever you think I might need." Which is sorta what I did. As a seasoned mother, I knew what I could live without (swing) and what I couldn't (cloth diapers/spit rags). This wasn't my first rodeo. Though you better believe it when I say it will be my last (just got scheduled for a little snippety snip this month).
So I was expecting the usual. Diapers, wipes, gift cards, newborn outfits out the wazoo. Funny that I didn't get those newborn outfits as much. I only received a handful. I had to buy gowns for her since I only had one and those things are AMAZING. And will be first on my list...

Numero uno: Baby gowns. Every new mom should have them. They make those midnight diaper changings soooo much simpler. Nothing like a squirming baby, lack of light, lack of sleep and snaps. You wake up the next morning and it looks like your 4 year old snapped up the front blindfolded. Plus if your baby is like mine, she didn't fit her newborn footed outfits too well. She would kick and stretch until both legs were tangled inside. Even better if you get the ones with built-in mittens.

Next up, nursing clothes or a gift card to get said clothes. Sure its fun to buy for the baby, but if you know Mom is planning to breastfeed, help her out! Nursing clothes aren't cheap. I had a hard time finding used ones. So I ended up just going with nursing camisoles and button up plaid shirts. But even cami tops are $25 a piece. Remember that Mom has to care for herself in order to care for baby. I think even I forget that at times. I get so caught up with doing what is needed for everyone else, that I lose track of what is going on with me. Point in case - how many times I've skipped a meal lately... Talk about the migraines I get later. Or the fact I am not getting enough water. Breast milk isn't being produced as much as I need it to be. So keep Mom's needs in mind as well as the baby's.

Walk Away the Pounds DVD's are fantastic.

You can't give these to just anyone though. You have to know the lady and know what her feelings about her weight and losing it will be. I'm very self conscious about my weight. I fully intend to lose all the baby fat by next June. Partly because I'll be getting married then, but mostly because I look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see. I plan to start using mine again. Just need to find times when the fiancé isn't around. Yep, self conscious around even him.

Baby Tongue/Gum Brushes are great for cleaning off the milk residue that babies have after feedings. I'm wishing I had gotten one. And now I'm finding it hard to get one. They used to sell the kind that fits on your finger.

Seeing the residue on my girls tongue makes me wish I had one.

Delivered Meals or Desserts are always welcomed. Notice I say desserts too. Do you know how often I've craved cookies or a slice of cake. But I'm too tired to make them myself most times. Granted, with wanting to lose weight, I suppose its for the best. But still... cravings are there at random times.

Nightlights are amazing. Waking up for those early morning feedings and changings, you really don't want to turn on blinding lights. Then you run the risk of waking up the baby and thus never getting sleep you desperately need. You also don't want to risk tripping over things, stubbing your toes, or even grabbing the wrong item for a diaper changing. My fiancé set up the 3D FX Death Star light.

If I absolutely need more light, I use the closet light. But baby girl likes the pattern on the wall from this one too.
Forget mittens. Get the baby socks. For their feet and hands. Okay, I know you are probably scratching your head at this. But let me explain it to you. This applies only to tall women having long babies. They typically have longer fingers and feet than other babies. And what I've learned, is that those mittens don't fit unless the baby never stretches their fingers out. It only works on permanent fists. She stretches, those mittens drop off. And then you can't cut the babies nails too soon. Too difficult. So those little razors flail through the air and usually scratch the tar out of themselves or Mom. She might look silly in the socks, but they work wonders when she's in long sleeves onesies.

No, they don't work well in short sleeves.

So what else have you found is a gift that gets overlooked, but is completely worth putting thought into? Share in the comments below!

She's here!

My daughter is officially here. However, this post comes a little late... She's now 14 days old.

My little girl has been marching to the beat of her own drum this entire time. It would seem she doesn't stay within the lines any more than her father and I do. As such, she came in her own good time.
Thursday, November 17th, I had my 39 week check up.

As part of that, the midwife attempted to check my cervix. It took quite a bit of effort, but she finally found it. In doing so, she disturbed the mucous plug. She scheduled my inducement for the following Sunday morning. Friday night, about midnight, my water burst. And over the next few hours my water gushed in spurts. Contractions got to 8 minutes apart before slowing down and becoming sporadic. At one time I had 2 strong ones within three minutes apart. Feeling like we should be safe rather than sorry, we decided to head to the hospital. After getting in, we filled out more paper work. Mind you, I had pre-registered twice already. My online version didn't count. And yet, I felt like I had answered all the same questions twice more after arriving at the hospital. Contractions were strong, but sporadic still. They got me hooked up to monitors and started the IV. While going through all this, I had a nurse and someone she was clearly training. The trainee knew more about entering the correct information into the computer system than the charge nurse did. The charge nurse told us that they had been busy all night long. And that some of those new moms admitted shouldn't have been having babies at all. I mean come on... who doesn't know what a circumcision is?! Especially if you are having a baby boy! Or how about a teenage mom who named her baby Anti Delicious. Are you setting her up to be a hooker?!
Moving right along... It came time to check my cervix. My fiancé was sitting in the waiting area just outside the curtain, listening. The charge nurse got gloves on and attempted to check my cervix. Apparently, mine was quite elusive. None of the medical professionals I dealt with that night and the following day could easily access it. NO ONE. She had me practically doing moves that made it look like an exorcism was taking place and still couldn't reach it. I'm whimpering and my fiancé is wondering if they are killing me. Then she calls another nurse down from the next floor who is known to have longer fingers. Again, I go into the crazy position and she struggles, but finally finds my cervix. I'm only at 2 centimeters by this point. My cervix is effaced and soft though and contractions were still strong, so they admit me and after a while of observing send me upstairs to Labor and Delivery.
Once I arrive upstairs, I'm hooked up to monitors and its early morning. They decide to get some Pitocin in me to see if we can kick start stronger, more regular contractions. I had my fiancé, his mother and his sister keeping me company. I cannot tell you how thankful I was to have them. We told stories and kept the laughter going. His mother also timed my contractions for me. It was very comforting and helped the time pass with ease. Getting closer to lunch time, we started betting on when she would be arriving. My fiancé was born at 1:19. And knowing how my baby girl likes to beat records (she was my only one that stayed inside past 38 weeks and refused to be coaxed out by standard methods), we were thinking she might try coming later than him. Though I was sincerely hoping for noon.
Contractions got stronger and I started to doubt that I would make it to the end. I was hoping for the end to get there quicker. For a moment I thought I was ready as to push, so the in laws went to wait outside. I was checked and at first they thought I was truly ready. Then I was checked by the other attending midwife when nothing seemed to happen with my pushes. Turned out my cervix had eluded the first midwife and I was only 6 centimeters along. They positioned me on my side and put a peanut-shaped workout ball between my legs. A little later, and I'm crying out from the intense pains. I get flipped to other side and the pain increases. Within 10-15 minutes of having last been checked, I was telling the nurse that it was time to push. The look of panic was seen briefly while she told her trainee I wasn't allowed to push until we got my midwives in the room. With or without them, I was kicking the ball away and rolling myself over as I was going to push. The head nurse looked and called over the headset, "I see hair! There's a head, she's ready to push." By now, the panic was obvious. The trainee grabbed one leg and I grabbed the other while commencing pushing. It felt like forever, though it was over quickly.
Meagan arrived and they laid her on my chest.

At first, my fiancé and I had concern at how dark she appeared. My concern was if she was breathing. His was more of if I had dabbled along the way. Thankfully when I spoke up, they turned on lights and we saw that she was bruised from her rapid descent. In my eyes, she was the most beautiful creature on earth. My little angel.
Our journey wasn't over. We were there 3 days dealing with jaundice tests and the ill results. Watching her under the blue lights was nerve wracking.

I didn't get an explanation to truly understand what was happening to her. I also hated the bands around her ankles. They cut into her skin and made her cry often. At one time, she managed to kick off the monitor (which freaked the nurses out). The responding nurse reattached it too tightly. I was looking for scissors...

We also had issues with the breastfeeding. She didn't get anything to come out until we got home. But she did make me bleed. It was quite the ordeal. And I'm incredibly happy its over. She's home and I'm preparing to return to work on Monday. I'm nowhere near ready for that step, but its just how things go. My little darling is finally here.

Finding time for Family

In this fast paced age, we are too often on the go. I struggle to balance work with spending time with the kids as well as keeping a clean home. I've had to get creative and keep things fun. Like asking the kids to sweep or vacuum with/for me. I have them each pick a task and tell them that the rewards for doing them are to help mommy, who has pain. Or that once we finish, we can do something fun together. And quicker than if I do it all myself. One of those fun things has been going to the bookstore. My daughter had money from her birthday and they each had completed the Half Price Books summer reading program. 

So they got to pick out books and movies they wanted. Plus my daughter bought a book. 

Tonight, I made a point to take a break from the usual chores to play instead. We took a couple Lego sets out and began to build with the kids. 

We also had smoothies and apple slices with caramel to sweeten the evening activities. They had a blast! 

I had them help me with getting the baby mobile ready for the little lady on the way.

The help we received from my future mother in law, my mother, and the kids made quite the beautiful addition. 

These little moments are swift in passing, but so sweet while they last. I think everyone should make a point to do something fun. Just every so often. And don't forget the bedtime story! 

Happy Mother's Day to all you amazing women!

It’s that time of year again. The time when we celebrate the wonderful Mothers, Grandmothers, and otherwise influential women in our lives. This upcoming Sunday is the one day a year when everyone feels compelled to salute their Mom. In my opinion, it should be the day we bust out birthday cake in pajamas and then all other days we say, "I love you, Mommy." But that's just me. You better have a gift and/or card already on the way. 

Being a Mother, not just a mom, is the hardest job any woman can possibly work. We don’t get recognition but once a year (if that). You don’t get paid for all the long hours, lack of sleep, hazardous spills, and crazy hair days. To all you women who have scared the UPS delivery guy by answering the door in your pajamas and hair that looks like you stuck your finger in a socket… I salute you! Been there, done that, and laughed at the look on their faces. Even when I was embarrassed to realize I had no bra on, I still laughed.

Your job as a Mother starts from conception. You will probably puke your guts up, outgrow everything you own (permanently), and in some cases gain scars that will never go away. But you will gain an experience that makes everything worth it in the end. The first time you hold that precious life in your arms, the life you made, you will be changed.

Then you get home and are tested to the utmost limits of your sanity. Indeed, you might even have breakdowns – mentally and physically. Hundreds of diaper changing, feedings every two hours, sleepless nights, cold meals (if you can stay awake to eat at all), and laundry every day. As they grow, your job doesn’t really get easier. Sure, you get a little more sleep finally. You can wash less clothes after age two. But now you have to put on the running shoes because they will NOT stand still no matter what you say or do. They test their own limits. What can they get away with? How far can they push you, before you throw your hands in the air and say, “I’m done!” They are like little sponges. So inquisitive. Curiosity is how they learn and grow. And then questions start. “Where do babies come from?” “Why is you pee-pee different than mine?” “Why is daddy so hairy?” Or even better, be walking through Walmart and pass the camouflage bras with your little boy. Chances are good that he will yell, “Look mom! Camouflage boobies!” They are so good at coming up with stuff like this. My mother as a child had it all figured out. She said, “Little girls play with each other. Little boys play with themselves.”

Even through the harder years, it’s worth it. If you do a good job as a parent, as a mother in particular, you will see the fruits of your efforts. And they last a lifetime. The love that never ends, that surpasses death, engulfs you. That child will always be your baby no matter what they do or how they grow. They will always run to you when they need nurturing and comfort. As they grow older, they will finally seek and possibly follow your advice. Some later than others… The closer a bond you have with them growing up, the closer they will be to you as they age.

The women who have my utmost respect and love are few, but completely my heroes.

My Mother. She has and always be the one I seek until death do us part. We might not see eye-to-eye on everything, but there is a respect that I will have forever. She’s given up everything for me. Her dream of being a nurse, her perfect model body, and on some days I think even her sanity. When I feel like I’m failing, she’s there giving me advice and telling me she’s proud of me still.

My Nana. This woman has endured more than your average single mom. She has worked harder than a man, been in beauty pageants, raised a son alone, took care of a mother that was bitter to the core, traveled the world, and is now struggling with a body that no longer works like her mind. I can only hope I’m half the lady she is.

Nana S. W. (You know who are) I’m not related to this one by blood, but by a bond stronger than blood. She started out as a pen-pal and now has become better than a grandmother to me. She will tell it to me straight, even if I won’t listen or don’t want to hear it. She’s had her hard life. As a woman on the police force, who was in an accident that cost her a leg and started her on the path on single motherhood, she has experienced more than I could possibly handle. But her wisdom has been there when I needed it.

Ava M. She was named my godmother, but has been more like family from the day I was born. I would do anything for her. Her life has so many amazing stories that built her. She may as well be another adopted grandmother in my life.

Sue L. has been my mentor and a great example of what a strong woman is since I was a volunteer in her US Naval Sea Cadet Corps. She has patience, strength, dedication and a whole lotta compassion for children.

I know I have a long road ahead of me. Especially as a single mother of three. I won’t give up. I won’t forget what I’ve learned. And I’ll be the best Mother I can! Definitely raising my kids to be future nerds with pride.

Kudos to those who are making the most of their time and raising an awesome future generation, with or without help!

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! 

Take life in stride

Its a whirlwind of action these days. With the incoming holidays, stress from work, daily tasks in relation to my children, and just getting my everyday to-do list done... I find myself being stretched thin. I also find my time management skills in need of honing.
In the next couple of weeks, I'll be training towards a position in leadership. I've come to terms with the need to fulfill a short term goal of staying at my retail job, and in so doing, I'll need to build up that pay check to keep my other goals in focus. I have no desire to stay in retail for a full career. Someone has to do it, just not me.
I'm also preparing for a long distance trip back to my friends and family in Florida. Almost a year has passed since I've had the comfort of being around people I love and trust so strongly. Besides, its also a chance to see a childhood friend graduating college, another good friend should have her baby by then, and being reuniting with a college friend that I hold in the highest regards. My excitement cannot be contained. Its certainly shining out in other aspects of my life.
This week, I get to deal with a 48 hour work week, Thanksgiving Day plans, and somewhere in between these, finishing my little projects. I doubt I'll find much time for me, but if I can just make it through....
I have another Shoplet review I'm working on for you guys.

I'm working on potty training my daughter. She loves her potty chair, but loves running around naked from the waist-down more. I'm beginning to wonder if she's going to be more difficult than her brothers after all.

There's a story that has been trapped in my head for too long. Being a creative writer at heart, I can't keep it locked up anymore. So every chance I get, I write it down. Then later I type it up. It may never be printed or sold. Maybe no one else will ever read it. But I have to get it written, nonetheless.
So what am I really getting at? 
My mother used to remind me quite often, "Don't lose yourself." I'm so-and-so's wife, mother to (insert child's name here), and so on. But who am I on my own? I'm a woman who goes by both her names. Who has many talents that mean nothing in the working world. I can weld, use pretty much every tool in my dads collection, build chopper-style bicycles, ride motorcycles, drive stick and automatic, spin a tale that is so unbelievable you have to believe, speed read, and kill almost everything I try to grow. Am I proud of these accomplishments? Most definitely... okay not the killing plants one. There isn't anything I can't do when I set my mind to it. So why are there days when I feel useless or as if I have nothing to offer? Partly because I have lived with someone who takes the time to put me down for everything I haven't done instead of recognizing what I do daily. Partly because, despite my best efforts, I don't seem to achieve too many of my ultimate goals. I see my failures in a stronger light than I do my completions. Let's be honest though, we are our worst critics. We put ourselves down needlessly. A dear friend of mine has been reminding me of this lately.

So what goals am I setting for myself now? To put out a more positive outlook. Instead of seeing the negative first, I'm going to search for the positive. Instead of saying yes to every request, I'm going to learn to say no. And instead of feeling rushed to finish everything for everyone, its time to manage what time I have a little better. Priorities will be made again. Even if it means going back to making lists.
Take everyday in stride, folks. And look for those positive things, no matter how small.

It's moving time again....

May I just start by saying... I HATE moving! It's miserable, time consuming and seems to be a strong supporter of holding me back.  In the little over 6 years I've been married we have moved about... 7 or 8 times? Including one very long and draining move across the country from Texas to Florida... with 3 small children in a Buick LeSabre with a trailer about the size of or slightly larger than my car trailing behind us. Besides the few hilarious moments when my deaf husband would do the fist pump so that truckers would honk as we went by, it was tiring. My back and legs ached and on parts of the drive I almost went off the highway when extreme exhaustion hit me like a sledgehammer. You see, I'm the only driver. And that's about 20 hours of driving with minimum stops. Plus I get to listen to the children complaining in the backseat, worry about the trailer dragging behind and wish I was alone on a sandy beach listening to anything besides the kids soundtrack CDs that I now have just about memorized. I've moved during pregnancies in the hottest parts of summers. I've packed entire apartments very nearly on my own while my husband slept during the day and worked overnight.
I hate moving. With a burning passion.
And yet, here I am again. Packing. Cleaning out. And preparing for another long move. 

 This time I'm transferring my job to another store so we won't have to end up living in a hotel while I scramble for work. And my husband is disabled. So there's some comfort. I've made friends here who are joining my other friends as online buddies. I feel like I'm abandoning my amazing coworkers here for the unknown folks of another store.
Housing arrangements are still in the air. My apartment here looks frightfully desolate as half of everything is in boxes already. And being OCD is driving me insane! I can't stand clutter, so having boxes stacked along the walls makes me feel like a freak from Hoarders.
Once again my children are showing signs of being unsettled as we have yet to firmly set roots anywhere.
So many questions swirling in my head. So many fears. Are my children ever going to have a good solid place to grow up? I sometimes feel like we go from apartment to apartment and they are like the puppies growing up in a pet store. They don't have room to run and play. To be free. For most of my childhood, my parents had houses. I went bike riding, roller blading, running, climbed trees... I had adventures. I want the same for my kids. But I'm always struggling. We can only afford so much. And time is quickly passing us by. Between work and getting daily chores done, we seem to miss the times of taking the boys fishing, going to the park, or visiting family and friends.
To make matters worse, my husband spends at least 2-3 hours (broken up in intervals between his gaming) to "talk" about what sort of housing situation I want. All the while knowing that I'm going to give the exact same answer I have been giving for the past month because we both know where we will end up in the end despite our best efforts for the ideal home. A house would be amazing. But at this point I'd settle for a 2 bedroom apartment so long as we get to where we are going and have a place to rest after the move. And so long as the one sided "discussions" finally end.
There are still the daily activities that come with being a working mother. Preparing and cleaning up after 2 meals a day, organizing the packing scene and de-cluttering, home schooling two highly active boys who get ants in their pants when told to sit still, working part time 3 days a week, and then trying to get enough sleep to keep me out of the zombie zone.
Some mornings I hear the "Mom" alarm and want to hit the snooze button (if only there was one). But the voices get louder. And they multiply.

I've been working on getting them ready for the move. I made up a backpack of toys, bought some fun packs from the Dollar Spot at Target, and tried telling them what's happening. They look forward to seeing their Oma and Papa. I got them in on "helping" me pack the toys...

 Finally there is the "Going Away" project. You know when you are going far enough away that you won't see the people you are close to for quite some time. So you plan shindigs and soirées to see everyone to say goodbye. Only it's hard to find those times. Most of them are later at night. Then comes writing those heartfelt goodbyes. I believe that when you truly mean it, you write it. Not just say it.
All of this leads to the choice of curling up  in the fetal position whilst growling at any who dare approach... Or rolling with the punches and taking it one step at a time. I'm still fighting the urge to take the first option.
I know that the next few months will be a completely different nightmare. On top of being in a new place, I'll be starting over in a new store as the new girl all over again. Let's be honest, I don't make friends well. I hide in my shell until someone forces me out. Ask my best friend. She literally scared the friendship into life. Then she dragged me into her circle of friends of our workplace adding two other besties to my life long pals list. I think that's sorta how it worked out in my latest job as well. The outgoing, friendly people pulled me in and one of them even gave me a run down on everyone else so I didn't come out feeling like a total stranger around everyone. Now I'm starting over...
School is going to be put on hold. Again. 6 years is a long time to put college on hold. Especially when you had so few classes left towards your degree.
So much to do. So little time. Sadness, frustration, anxiety... all tugging away at what's left of this moms sanity. I certainly hope for the best, fear the worse and will do everything I can to make it the best transition possible! Thanks for listening to my craziness. Feel free to tell me what you think about it in a comment below.

Bad Parenting meets the Retail Team

I get a call asking for my assistance and make my way to where I’m needed. A coworker is there with two young girls looking for their mother. Just as I arrive the mother is claiming her children. “See what happens when you wander off?” - is all she had to say. No - thanks for finding my daughters! No – oh I was so worried about you two!

So I asked what the story was and how they came to be with my coworkers. While one of the women was straightening aisles, the two girls came by alone and looking scared. The worker asked if she could help them find something. They told her they had lost their mom and were trying to find her. When the worker offered to have their mom paged on the intercom system, they were immediately terrified and begged her not to do that. “I remember what happened the last time I did that. I was in so much trouble! Please don’t do that.” What the?! Excuse me?? They began crying at this point so the employee told them she would just walk with them and try to help them find their mom and when they found her, she would walk away so the girls wouldn’t be in any trouble. And that’s what they did. What kind of mother punishes her kids so horribly that they are afraid to call her if they get separated or to ask for help? Suppose someone in the store colors who wasn’t an employee found them and tricked them into coming outside? Suppose mom didn’t come around the corner just a few minutes later and get them? NEVER should a parent make their kids scared to ask for help, especially in a large retail store! If you are embarrassed to have your name paged, don’t bring your kids with you. OR pay more attention. I’m willing to bet, she was the one who kept walking when the girls had stopped to look at something and didn’t realize mom wasn’t there. I also wouldn’t be surprised if she punished them when they got home. Like they say… Any idiot can be a mom. But it takes a lot of love, patience, and understanding to be a Mother. You Madam, are not worthy of being a Mother.

Scoliosis: affecting life and pregnancy

Scoliosis is a subject dear to my spine. I've had it since elementary school, though I didn't always know what it was. What is scoliosis? Its a disease within the spinal skeleton that causes the spine to grow into a curve instead of straight up and down. When I was in 1-2 grades, kids poked me in the back and laughed at my protruding shoulder blades. They referred to me as the girl with boobs in her back because basically thats what it looks like to a bunch of kids. Later, at 12 years old, I was walking through a thrift store that my mom frequented a lot. The owner was a nice elderly lady. Well, one day while walking through her store she started staring at me strangely. She came up to us and asked if I had been diagnosed with scoliosis yet. I had never even heard the word before and though my mother had, she never really noticed anything being odd. The lady pointed out some helpful hints for spotting the disease:

1. If wearing an outfit that zips up the back - the zipper often curves to one side with more progressed cases.
2. If a person having scoliosis bends over to touch their toes, you will see the shoulder blades protruding at various degrees. One might be higher than the other. This goes for the hips as well.
3. While standing straight (as a person having the disease can) one side will be lower than the other. One shoulder will appear to be slouched down and standing flat footed can be impossible for more severe cases as mine was.

Well, as you can guess, a visit to the pediatrician led to a visit to a pediatric orthopedic specialist. The best in the region I believe. He was the highest ranking doctor in his field at the time. Doctor R. J. Cummings (http://www.healthgrades.com/physician/dr-robert-cummings-xsvqy). He was very patient, explained everything clearly, and most importantly he never tried to butter up the truth. He told it like it was.
My case was far from usual. First, I had a double curve or S curve. This is where the bones in the spine curve to look like one large S instead of a straight line. Secondly, when they measured the degrees of each curve (tells them how far from a normal straight line it is), I had a 52 on the top and 58 on the bottom. Those are big numbers. First question they had was, "Are you feeling any pain or discomfort?" Well, no? Back pains were never any issue for me. I felt like a normal, healthy 12 year old. The next thing they wondered is why no one noticed until it had progressed that far. Well, mom didn't really notice much as it was. And while I noticed (I got teased for it remember?), I thought it was yet another manifestation of me being oddly different from everyone else. (Which suited me just fine since I enjoyed being the odd one that never fit in anyhow.)

So what does this mean? Well, when you have a more severe case like mine chances are slim that you can get by with a body brace. Mild cases that require treatment but not surgery, can be treated with the use of a body brace that straightens the torso and keeps a person in a rigid position until the bones are taught to grow in a straight line again or until they stop growing altogether. Moms sometimes love this idea for teaching their kids how to sit straight. Ever have your mom say, "Sit up straight! Don't slouch!" Body braces keep you straight whether you like it or not!

For my case and similiar cases, this wouldn't work. I was growing still and at a rate of 2 degrees a month I think it was, it wouldn't have taken much longer for me to end up in a wheel chair paralyzed and in constant pain. Surgery was needed as soon as possible. I began donating my own blood towards my surgery. 1 pint a month for 4 month. Its the safest way and provides for the better healing experience since a body is used to its own blood rather than having to be introduced to someone elses.
The surgery is called Spinal Fusion. For milder curves, 1 rod will be attached or fused to the bones with a few screws. As the bone grows, it follows the shape of the rod ensuring that it stays straight. For a case like mine, 2 rods were needed. The rods were fused with 4 clamps (2 on each side) and lots of screws. I was quite tall with a long torso though. The first surgery I had (out of 3) was done later the same year I was diagnosed. It went very well. Recovery included some strict rules for the next 6 months.

1. No bending.
2. No heavy lifting.
3. No twisting or turning.
4. No jumping (really is a bummer when you love trampolines and jump ropes).
5. No strenuous activities that could put pressure or stress on the spine.

I learned to do a lot of things differently. I learned to pick up things with my feet since I couldn't bend. My legs grew stronger since I had to squat down to pick things up if they were too heavy or awkward to get with my feet. I learned to like the couch since I couldn't sleep in my own bed comfortably for quite some time. I got used to having my mother come and help me bathe since I could only stand there and get the front of me. For someone who enjoyed her independence, it was a trial and half.
At 15 years old, I'm having pains in my lower spine. So when I go for another check up, they take a closer look at my X-rays. I find out that a screw had broken and was needing to be replaced because the curve was starting to grow again. Thus started the jokes about bionic girl needing her bolts tightened.... Normally a girl stops growing when she starts her menstrual cycle. May I point out, I'm not normal. I was still growing even though I should have been done 4 years before. Either the growing bone broke the hardware or the hardware broke allowing me to grow sideways again. So, surgery 2 commenced.
All was well for the next 3 years. In between surgeries I developed arthritis in my lower back and hips. This is normal when something metal is installed in the human body. Its often noticed when the weather changes. You feel it in your bones that a storm is coming, that rain is on the way. Just before I turned 18, I started having some pretty strong pain. Thinking that something might have broken again, we went in to check up on it. Everything appeared normal. X-rays showed nothing broken or damaged, blood and urine tests came back normal, and even the bone scan showed nothing out of the ordinary. I also had no fevers indicating infection, but then I don't think I've ever had an infection. Doctor Cummings decided to take the hardware out. I prepared for surgery #3.
It was only after he opened me up and took out all that metal that he found a severe infection eating away at the bones in my lower spine. During the operation, a PICC line was inserted. A PICC line is a peripherally inserted central catheter. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peripherally_inserted_central_catheter)  Its used to administer antibiotics over an extended period. The line was inserted in my right arm peripheral Cephalic vein, ran across my chest, and ended directly in my heart for optimal deliverance of the antibiotics. The original strand of infection was not easily diagnosed so I was released from the hospital with a temporary antibiotic that they later changed when the culture came back. For the next 9 months, I once again followed the strict rules, but I also had to be trained to give myself the required antibiotics to kill the infection. They had to be administered everyday, twice a day for 9 months non-stop. It was interesting going to work and having co-workers stare or shudder as I unrolled the outer line and started the long process in the break room. Its a multi-step process that can take about 10 minutes to complete.

• First you clean the insertion part.
• Then you flush the line with saline solution to clear out any blood that may have flowed into the tube.
• Next you put in the antibiotic (always checking to make sure air bubbles are out first). This one was the slowest part.
• Next came another dose of saline solution. This stuff gives you a very cold feeling as it runs up your arm and across the chest.
• Finally you put in the heparin lock to seal everything in place. It always gave me a bitter metallic taste in my mouth.

After everything was settled from the final surgery, the doc released me with a clean bill of health. He told me I could live a normal life and do pretty much anything that anyone else could. (Military didn't agree though.) The one warning he did offer was this: getting pregnant and having a natural birth may be difficult for me. I'm not 100% straight in the spine. My shoulder blades still protrude more than normal and my hips are not in perfect alignment with each other. One hip sticks out  farther.
Getting pregnant hasn't been the problem. I've got the 3rd bun in the oven right now. The pregnancies themselves, however, have had their very difficult moments. My first son was pretty smooth sailing until the end. Towards the end I had a lot of back pain. But then.... I also gained 45 pounds with him and had a lot of water weight gain that made everything hurt. My second son was harder. Even at the very beginning there were days when I could barely walk and I had to quit my job because of the pain getting to be too much. This third one has been the hardest of all.
When you have scoliosis, your spine doesn't curve and change like it should. When you have the spinal fusion operations, you are stuck ram rod straight. You never change or curve besides the normal bending over or tilting to the side. With exercize, you should be able to train your back to become quite flexible though. But during pregnancy, your spine won't accomodate the baby the way it needs to. My babies seek to curl up on my lower spine pinching the nerve and causing severe pain. If I move in just a certain way, it causes me to freeze up and begin to fall. Simple things like bending, walking or even driving hurts. Another problem during pregnancy that a scoliosis patient might face - not being able to breathe well. Since there is no room and things are crammed up anyway, your lungs may not be able to expand as well as they do normally. You find yourself out of breath doing simple tasks or even while walking.
I've done a lot of research on these things. I've seen many different doctors and gotten many different suggestions for pregnancy and labor issues.

• When you are not pregnant, exercize regularly. Build up the muscle strength in your back. It helps strengthen the bones. Doing sit ups, crunches, and weight lifting can help.
• Take calcium supplements. Build up the nutrients in your bones.
• During pregnancy, keep as active as you can without pushing your limits. Ask your doctor what they think is best for you since everyone is different.
• Water exercizes are always the best! It supports your extra weight and takes a load off. I like just floating in the water sometimes.
• If you are having trouble breathing, relax. Straighten up and stretch out.
• Some people have the option of physical therapy. For someone like me, this is not so much of option. Most health care providers see me as a liability and don't want to take a chance on me trying something and getting worse.
• Tylenol is about the only over the counter medicine you can take for pain. I don't suggest you take it too often though. It is a blood thinner.
• Heating pads are wonderful! So are hot showers and hot baths. Heat therapy soothes the muscles and relaxes you.
• Maternity belts can be helpful as well. They offer extra support under the belly and around the back.
• Discuss labor options with your healthcare provider. I couldn't lay on my back for very long. It was excrutiatingly painful. So for my second sons birth I had a midwife and gave birth at home. I endured the pains while walking around and standing in the shower in intervals.
• But no matter what - take it easy! If you have someone who can help you when things get tough, I strongly advise you to ask them.

I hope someone finds this information useful. Or at least learned something. Scoliosis affects so many people in so many ways. Chances are you know someone who has at least a mild case even if they don't realize it.

Show and Tell sonogram review

So as I've mentioned in a previous post, I'm pregnant with baby #3. I had the normal 2D ultrasound done with my doctor at the beginning of my pregnancy, but with those… Well, let’s be honest. Can you tell what you are looking at? I sure can’t. Everything looks weird and blurry and I mostly just tune out the doctor talking to herself and listen to the heartbeat. Since I’m planning to make this my last baby, I really wanted to see it. Not some black and white blob picture that doesn’t make sense to me. I went online and started searching for places around San Antonio that offered 4D sonograms. May I just say… wow! They are really expensive. Most places charge $200-$900 depending on the package you choose. I finally found one that offered a simple package including 2 2D pictures, 2 4D pictures, and everything on a CD - all for $110.00. Show and Tell, located on 16607 Blanco Road, Suite 801 San Antonio, Texas 78232 not only had the best prices, their staff is extremely friendly and patient. I brought my 2 young sons along and even though they ran around the room and kept talking, the sonogram tech just laughed. I had drank water all week exclusively until I felt like a bloated cow in an attempt to make the picture as clear as possible. I was really, really hoping that this one was going to be a baby girl. And sure enough, as soon as we got started her legs were open and that’s the first thing we saw. After that, the tech did everything she could to ensure we got the best pictures we could of the baby. She had me roll over, walk around, use the bathroom… and in the end I got some amazing shots of my beautiful daughter. That package that I chose was called the Peek a Boo Special. In the end. I paid only $100 because I booked right before the price changes went into effect. And instead of just 4 pictures - I got 4 color 4D pictures and I think 6 black and white 2D pictures. Truly a value.

So, if you live in San Antonio, happen to be pregnant and want a 2, 3 or 4D sonogram for reasonable prices I strongly suggest Show and Tell. If you don't get a clear picture they do everything they can to try to make it better and even have options for going back and trying later at a free or discounted rate. I also liked that they had the option of being able to Skype the session with a family member who is too far away to be there. And you can bring the whole family (up to 11 people I think).

http://www.showandtellultrasoundsa.com/

While you were sleeping....

Cups to make,diapers to change,
little boys wanting to strip and run naked...
While you were sleeping.
Dishes to wash,
laundry to finish,
things to organize and move...
While you were sleeping.
Floors will be cleaned,
counters will sparkle,
toys moved out of the way...
While you were sleeping.
I'll feed the boys,
prepare them for bed,
after I finish their schooling...
While you were sleeping.
Check the mail,
take out the trash,
and finally have your meal ready...
While you were sleeping.
Does it end there?
No.
Your lunch will be sitting, ready to grab and go.
All the things you need for work, will I set out...
While you were sleeping.
And if I have time,
I'll lay out your work clothes...
While you were sleeping.

An original poem written by Emily S. Vinyard on August 30, 2011