Showing posts with label mothers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mothers. Show all posts

Saturday, March 2, 2019

Creating Lasting Memories Through Crafting

My daughters both love their 18" dolls. They have all kinds of dresses and accessories for them. And then my Mom sent some American Doll craft books. If you are new to reading my blog, then let me start by saying that I believe creativity is an important part of growing up. A child that learns to think and be creative while young, will be more successful later in life. Which is why I helped my daughter try out some of the crafts. And I must admit, we created some awesome accessories for the dolls. 
Our dolls love to read. To expand their minds and learn about everything. Best way to do this is to get books from the library. And when you check books out, they get stamped. Or at least used to... 

And then when the doll learns something she wants to remember, she needs her composition notebook. 

And then there are so many reasons to give gifts. So a wrapped box that opens and closes is perfect for re-gifting moments! 
But you know what is better than all that? She and I worked together to create the things she liked. All because she helped me with my steampunk designs earlier. Her interest was peaked. We did all this while creating memories. She was able to craft with me. That is the most important element for us. Creating memories and deep connections that I hope will last a lifetime. 
What do you do to connect with your kids? No matter the age. What is one thing you do special with them? Let me know in the comments below!

Tuesday, November 20, 2018

6 Things I Learned When My Daughter Had Her Tonsils and Adenoids Removed

A simple procedure, but it takes so much planning and time... who knew that having my daughters tonsils and adenoids removed would require me to step up my Mom game? I had mine out around her age, but of course I don't remember much besides getting a Popsicle in the hospital afterwards. I certainly learned a thing or two, however, that I think other parents can benefit from. 

Why did we do it? 
First off, this wasn't something we wanted to do. But this kid went through 3 bouts of strep throat and antibiotics before the pediatrician said no more! Her little body can't handle that much. Plus, according to the specialist we were sent to, she had very large tonsils. Probably why she snored so heavily. And SO loud! You have to understand why and truly be on board with it before agreeing to it. Her tonsils took up a huge part of the back of her throat. There was no escaping the need. No coming up with excuses and putting it off.

Stock up on all the essentials. 
Since she could only eat soft things for up to 10 days, Popsicles, ice cream, yogurt, pudding and jello were the top items to get. She didn't like jello or pudding, so we stuck with the other things. Then you might consider things like broth - but remember it has to be served cooled/room temperature. I also got Pedialyte to make sure she got some nutrients. Aside from that, water is the best thing she can drink for a while. 
Remember to schedule it carefully. 
We scheduled it right before the Thanksgiving week break so that she only had to miss a day and a half from school. Didn't want to get into trouble or have her falling behind in her studies while she was recovering. Recovery is for 10 days. Whether your child has school or you have work - schedule accordingly! I found that talking to the teacher ahead of time was a huge help. If needed, they can provide school work to keep your kiddo up to speed.

Have someone available to help. 
I strive to be a Wonder Mom every day. It is not easy - that's for sure. It can be so tiring at times. And after something like this, you need someone to tag team for a day. We had to be at the hospital at 5:30 in the morning, even though her surgery was scheduled for 7:30 (and didn't get under way until 8). So we had to get up at 4:30 in the morning. Then after her surgery, we stayed for her 4 hour observation period. By the time we got home, I was exhausted. I could barely keep my eyes open. Thankfully, my husband took the night off and happily watched the kids while I laid down for a nap. Remember that it is not only because we are waking so early, but the stress can wear you out too. 
At other times, her siblings tried to keep her company and have been helping her when she asks for something. Even my boys have been spoiling their little sister - and they are usually the ones arguing with her!
Be firm -_-
I can't tell you how difficult this has been. On the fifth day since her surgery and this girl has been really begging for other foods. She almost tricked me into letting her have a chip. Talk about wanting to pull my hair out! I have finally gotten graphic in my responses. Talking about having to go back for more surgery wasn't cutting it. So I had to go into detail. "You eat these foods, you could rip out your stitches. You will bleed a lot and I have to take you back to the hospital where they do more surgery. Then you miss Thanksgiving dinner. AND miss out on more than 2 days of school." Harsh, right? But she needed the wake up call. She was asking for chicken nuggets, chips, sandwiches, fries... Yes, these things smell so good and make our mouths water - BUT - NO! So steel yourself. It will come and you will want to cave at those big baby eyes, pleading for mercy and begging for something they can't have. But be strong. Say no. 

Have fun with it! 
My daughter started begging for regular foods without 3 hours of her surgery. And every time since that I made the family something that she wanted, she made comments about how good it smelled or how she wanted some "so bad!". My husband got to the point where he would sit there and take a bite while closing his eyes and saying, "Mmmm". Now before you tell me how cruel this is, remember that for the week before her surgery, she did nothing but talk about how she was going to eat Popsicles and ice cream every single day while we had to eat vegetables! My, how the tables have turned... Now she can't wait to have those home cooked dinners. 


I hope you don't have to deal with such things. They can be so exhausting and stressful. But if you do, I hope this list of helpful hints makes it just a little bit easier for you!

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Labor Day Adventures

I hope everyone had a wonderful Labor Day with those they love! I know I did. We took the kids to our favorite park, Converse City Park.
They have made some additions to the expansive park that make it more fun for the medium-sized kids.
Even my husband and I joined in the play.

So glad I had my Nexcare bandages with us. It seemed to be a day for everyone to have need of them at the park.
Even with temperatures being around only 90 degrees, we found ourselves running out of water and overheating. So we made a run to the store on the way home to get stuff to grill and ice cream to make milkshakes with.
It was a beautiful day that had the kids ready to sleep by 7! Which was good since they had school the following morning. It is days like this when I feel truly blessed. No matter what happens in my life. I am reminded that we have so much to grateful for. So much to enjoy. I hope you can find something every day!

Friday, June 16, 2017

A follow up to a previous situation

I had written about starting up a Go Fund Me for hiring a lawyer and seeking full custody of my children. After reading a comment to that post, I have decided to follow up on what happened to that end. 

I started up the fundraiser and a dear friend of mine made a considerably large donation. The gratitude I felt was tremendous. I didn't even think I would get the amount she had donated, let alone more. Call it an empty hope created by desperation. I have learned, however, that God moves in mysterious ways. So after receiving that amount, I called up someone that I was given high recommendations to. This person was previously a lawyer and the best when it came to family cases. What I hoped for was a weight to be lifted from my shoulders. What was returned to me instead was a blow to my dreams. He is now a mediator who works to find middle ground for those in legal disputes. He also refers you to the best in the business depending on your needs. He explains the law and what options you have. My options are not just limited. They are singular. The state of Texas protects the accused in some ways, more than the victims. I should've known this. After all, I've been involved in a case where I interpreted for a friend whose illegal deaf wife tried to kill him in his sleep, with his children present and witnessing, and she not only got out of being deported (despite those who knew her pushing for that option), but she also got out of jail and was given primary custody of the kids. If that is possible, how much more so a guy keeping his rights when he does things morally wrong with or to his children? 
The legal advice I received knocked me down a peg and put me in the cloud cover of doubting my ability to be the Mom I need to be. I was told that the State would not easily give full custody to one parent over the other, if at all. They will exhaust other options, and funding, to keep both parents in the children's lives. Even fighting for supervised visits with the documentation I have would cost me in the neighborhood of $10,000. And that's just a start. Instead, I was told to document every instance in a journal. Make sure my kids tell me everything. Make sure they can reach me no matter what time or where while with him. And to pray that nothing bad happens. I have since filed an additional report with Child Protective Services. They began an investigation, but I was told that the situation fell into a slightly gray area. So they would reach out to my ex-husband and inform that certain actions are from here on, prohibited. Should anything happen again, they will look further into supervised visitation rights. As for the kids being left alone or unsupervised at the theme park, that isn't considered a bad thing that they will investigate until one of them is severely injured, kidnapped, or worse. So the training of them knowing exactly how to respond to strangers, dangerous situations, or being in a moment of feeling uncomfortable about something has taken on an urgent tone. We talk about it often. My daughter knows to yell to her brothers for assistance if her father refuses to listen to her. I choose to think that I have scared him enough with my words and actions that he will back away from ever making such choices again. 
The campaign I had started, was removed. The money I had received was returned to my donors. I am focusing on doing what I can to make them safe as much as possible. I also pray that God's will be done and that I have strength to accept what I cannot control. Its a hard way to live. Its a struggle that I have to endure. May it be known, however, that I will not seek a way into the loophole I have been made aware of. I will stay ready for the moment when I can finally have them safe and be done with him. I have expressed to them and to him, that they have the ability to call me any time for any reason. I send snacks and food as I'm able to ensure they are well fed. I also feed them before they leave and upon returning to me. 
I love them dearly. I may not have made all the right choices. I may still be learning from the decisions and outcomes I have been through, but I keep pushing forward. I will always do my best for them.

Friday, January 13, 2017

Measuring Success

According to Dictionary.com, success is defined as follows:
1. The favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one's goals.   
2. The attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.   
 
Lately, I would have to say that I don't feel very successful. I've had many goals, but very little have been carried into completion. I seem to create goals that end up discarded along the way. Dreams get placed on the shelf. I know I've talked about this before. It seems to be a life-long thing at this point.
I'm by no means wealthy. Not even in the 'comfortable life' sense. I live paycheck to paycheck with a little thrown into savings for those inevitable vehicle repairs that I seem to have more often than I would like. My position in life is the same now that it has been all my life - middle class to poor. Though I suppose I have finally moved into a white collar job. I have no distinguishing honors. I know a little about a lot of things, but nothing to specialize in.
 
My life goals:
Finish college (Quit when I got married and pregnant)
Become an ASL Interpreter (Have to finish college to get this)
Buy a house (Would have this year, if my ex-husband didn't pull me down with his tax evasion)
Become a writer on the side (Finally accepted that I'm not as good a writer as I thought)
Create my own business (Takes money to make money and I don't have it)
 
So how do I know if I am successful? If I compare myself by the definitions, I'm not. I haven't obtained any of my goals, wealth, honors, position, etc.. I barely keep my family afloat, and that's just surviving - not living. If I compare myself to other women, I'm nowhere near as successful as I should be. I'm not on the same level as some of the "white trash" types I've met over the past few years, but I'm also not doing well in keeping my kids on the right track in some areas. My kids aren't honor students. Okay maybe my 4 year old daughter will be, but her brothers aren't. I no longer own my vehicles, but make payments. I live in the crappiest apartment I have ever been stuck in. Even the first one I was in, next door to drug dealers and hookers, was better health-wise than this one. I spend more time at work every day, than I do at home. My kids see me maybe 3 hours during the week, everyday. During the weekend, I'm busy running errands, cleaning the house, or trying to catch up on projects (sometimes this includes side work). All for what? The mediocre life of getting by?
No where do I see the shining story of rising above and making a difference. More recently, I have felt like a failure at the job. I've worked hard to assist my supervisor and it seems our efforts are for nothing. And it has shown me how little I know. I now get annoyed by being called a unicorn when before I felt honored. For those of you who don't know the meaning, see the video below. Maybe its because I've been out of school for so long and that's where my success seemed better. Maybe its because I just had a baby and I still feel like a fat cow. But throw everything together and I don't see where "successful" is in the description of me.
So I pose a question to Mom's out there. How is success measured for us?

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Happy Mother's Day!

Mother’s Day is upon us. If you haven’t gotten your Mom a special gift still, you need to get on the ball. I ordered my mom a special gift. She can be so difficult to buy for. She doesn’t need jewelry. And she prefers picking out her own. She doesn’t need sweets. As a matter of fact, she is always talking about dieting or losing weight. Flowers are a waste of her time. They look pretty for a couple days, and then she has a mess to clean up. Live plants… yeah she has a tendency to kill those. My dad is the one with the ability to bring them back to life as long as she doesn’t mess with them. House decorations and furniture are her passion to pursue. I dare not step in and offer something as her style is something I wouldn’t know how to match. Aside from loving milk glass, I can’t think of anything else I could offer. And even then, she has so much of it all over the place… I’m not sure she would have room for more.

I thought about ordering her meals that would be delivered. She does have 8 kids still living at home to feed. But what would they all like? I’d send her a nanny so she can take the night off… but let’s face it. She always tells me how she doesn’t know what to do with herself when the kids aren’t around. According to some people, that’s a recipe for her baby machine to kick on.
So I sent her something that I know she uses. I can’t tell you on here, because she reads my blog posts. But if she likes it, I’ll hopefully share about it.

I love my mother. She’s been an important part of my life. Always there when I need her. We don’t always see eye-to-eye, but we are still there for each other.
Take a moment to thank your mother and tell her how much you love her. She won’t be around forever. And not just your mom. Grandmothers, Aunts, Sisters, and those special women that have been an influence in your life need to be reminded of how much you care.

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Happy Mother's Day to all you amazing women!

It’s that time of year again. The time when we celebrate the wonderful Mothers, Grandmothers, and otherwise influential women in our lives. This upcoming Sunday is the one day a year when everyone feels compelled to salute their Mom. In my opinion, it should be the day we bust out birthday cake in pajamas and then all other days we say, "I love you, Mommy." But that's just me. You better have a gift and/or card already on the way. 

Being a Mother, not just a mom, is the hardest job any woman can possibly work. We don’t get recognition but once a year (if that). You don’t get paid for all the long hours, lack of sleep, hazardous spills, and crazy hair days. To all you women who have scared the UPS delivery guy by answering the door in your pajamas and hair that looks like you stuck your finger in a socket… I salute you! Been there, done that, and laughed at the look on their faces. Even when I was embarrassed to realize I had no bra on, I still laughed.

Your job as a Mother starts from conception. You will probably puke your guts up, outgrow everything you own (permanently), and in some cases gain scars that will never go away. But you will gain an experience that makes everything worth it in the end. The first time you hold that precious life in your arms, the life you made, you will be changed.
Then you get home and are tested to the utmost limits of your sanity. Indeed, you might even have breakdowns – mentally and physically. Hundreds of diaper changing, feedings every two hours, sleepless nights, cold meals (if you can stay awake to eat at all), and laundry every day. As they grow, your job doesn’t really get easier. Sure, you get a little more sleep finally. You can wash less clothes after age two. But now you have to put on the running shoes because they will NOT stand still no matter what you say or do. They test their own limits. What can they get away with? How far can they push you, before you throw your hands in the air and say, “I’m done!” They are like little sponges. So inquisitive. Curiosity is how they learn and grow. And then questions start. “Where do babies come from?” “Why is you pee-pee different than mine?” “Why is daddy so hairy?” Or even better, be walking through Walmart and pass the camouflage bras with your little boy. Chances are good that he will yell, “Look mom! Camouflage boobies!” They are so good at coming up with stuff like this. My mother as a child had it all figured out. She said, “Little girls play with each other. Little boys play with themselves.”
Even through the harder years, it’s worth it. If you do a good job as a parent, as a mother in particular, you will see the fruits of your efforts. And they last a lifetime. The love that never ends, that surpasses death, engulfs you. That child will always be your baby no matter what they do or how they grow. They will always run to you when they need nurturing and comfort. As they grow older, they will finally seek and possibly follow your advice. Some later than others… The closer a bond you have with them growing up, the closer they will be to you as they age.
The women who have my utmost respect and love are few, but completely my heroes.
My Mother. She has and always be the one I seek until death do us part. We might not see eye-to-eye on everything, but there is a respect that I will have forever. She’s given up everything for me. Her dream of being a nurse, her perfect model body, and on some days I think even her sanity. When I feel like I’m failing, she’s there giving me advice and telling me she’s proud of me still.
My Nana. This woman has endured more than your average single mom. She has worked harder than a man, been in beauty pageants, raised a son alone, took care of a mother that was bitter to the core, traveled the world, and is now struggling with a body that no longer works like her mind. I can only hope I’m half the lady she is.
Nana S. W. (You know who are) I’m not related to this one by blood, but by a bond stronger than blood. She started out as a pen-pal and now has become better than a grandmother to me. She will tell it to me straight, even if I won’t listen or don’t want to hear it. She’s had her hard life. As a woman on the police force, who was in an accident that cost her a leg and started her on the path on single motherhood, she has experienced more than I could possibly handle. But her wisdom has been there when I needed it.
Ava M. She was named my godmother, but has been more like family from the day I was born. I would do anything for her. Her life has so many amazing stories that built her. She may as well be another adopted grandmother in my life.
Sue L. has been my mentor and a great example of what a strong woman is since I was a volunteer in her US Naval Sea Cadet Corps. She has patience, strength, dedication and a whole lotta compassion for children.
I know I have a long road ahead of me. Especially as a single mother of three. I won’t give up. I won’t forget what I’ve learned. And I’ll be the best Mother I can! Definitely raising my kids to be future nerds with pride.
Kudos to those who are making the most of their time and raising an awesome future generation, with or without help!



HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! 

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Getting back into my routines...

Getting back in the groove...
My laziness in home life responsibilities has been showing lately. Home schooling while also working a full time job had become overwhelming to the point I wanted to just call it all quits and put them in school. My husband, who wasn't being supportive, was all for it. After all, he didn't want to take time out from what he does to help with what he deemed my responsibility. It made for quite a frustrating month. 
It came to a breaking point this past week. The conversation of divorce even entered the arena. Stress levels and migraines went through the roof as I tried to make sense of it all. I desperately grasped for moments of calm in the sea of chaos. Where did I go wrong? How do I get my feet back on solid ground? It didn't help to have someone accusing me of being all the things I strive to NOT be. Insult upon injury. 
I can't say my husband and I are getting better. But I do know I'm determined to fix my mothering issues. I've buckled down on being on a daily schedule. It's helped me catch up on what I've fallen behind in. They are enjoying the school work a little more so it's not a chore.
I'm cleaning as needed instead of all the time as a way to avoid other projects. Don't get me wrong, I'm still OCD about cleanliness. I just won't clean the same mess every couple minutes (kids toys) just so I don't have to do something else that is more important. 
I've noticed that the stress and lack of enthusiasm (depression if you will) has caused the pounds to once again pile on. Normally I'd consider it a blessing. I've gone down two pants sizes in the past three months. But considering my only workouts are those at work or cleaning at home, the excess is gathering in the middle. At work it's all weight lifting and walking. Carrying those 50 pound bags of dog food or hauling 20 pound boxes up ten foot ladders. The upper body strength is great. It's one of the things I said I'd work on this year anyhow. But it's not trimming the stomach which is building a gut. I've also gotten to where I eat simply because I'm depressed and not because I'm hungry. The things I eat aren't part of the healthy spectrum. So I'm getting back to disciplining my health. I need to set a better example for those looking up to me.
Cutting back on sweets. Limiting my portions. And working out those abs more. I've got Just Dance games for the Xbox 360 as well as the Wii. Playing them will also give me a chance to have fun with my kids. I used to be so much more energetic and fun. It's time to bring that back. 
I can't guarantee roses and sun shine every day. The daily grind and constant battles that I feel I must fight alone, often threaten to drag me down. I get my happiest moments from my children.
It's a conscious choice I have to make to get up and push back. To tell myself I can take it and more without falling. I'm not going to accept  failure and give up. It takes a lot, and I'm not alone in this scenario. I know I can't fool myself all the time. Some days I'm going to feel broken and I might even cry. I'll try to grab my journal and write the thoughts furiously flowing from head to hand in a river of emotions. Then I'll move on as if nothing is wrong. It's not always easy, but it's how I cope. And this is how I get through the difficult times. I'm getting back in the groove of accomplishments. I am going to make a better life somehow. One day at a time. For me and my kids. 
Remember this saying: "This too shall pass." No matter what it is, good or bad, it has it's limits and won't stick around forever. 

"The loneliest moment in someone’s life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly."
F. Scott Fitzgerald

Thursday, May 22, 2014

What a day...

Today I got a taste of what a single mom must go through. I drove my husband about halfway to Houston (1 1/2 hours) to meet his best friend for a guys sleepover. The whole drive home I heard whining, complaining and crying coming from 3 backseats. 
"Mom, I'm hungry!"
"Mom, can we go to the playground?"
"Wahhhhh!"
"Mom, how much longer?"
I'm surprised I didn't end up with a migraine. I did catch myself gripping the steering wheel a couple times though. 
Upon arriving home, it was leftover pizza for lunch. Then my daughter wanted to be held for a while. She's going through a bout of allergies. We all watched tv for a bit and the sleepiness started to drift in on me. I decided to send the kids to play as I hate lazy little ones. I started researching deals and cutting coupons to stay awake. Next thing I know... Dinner time?! How did that happen??? 
Time to make pigs in blankets! It wasn't as much of a hit as I hoped but they at least asked for seconds. Then of course it's time to clean up which means baths for the boys. This also means cleaning the bathroom as they love splashing. 
Then my little girl wakes up. Dinner time starts all over again. The boys cry for movie time. 
I wish this was the end of my day. But this is my second wind. Teeth will need brushing, daughter needs bathing, one son needs sheets on his bed... 
My daughter, however, did bring a smile to my face. She's in love with shoes! So every chance she gets, she takes them from the closet and puts them on (even if they don't match). She loves to play dress up now too. 
Tomorrow should be a fascinating day. Not sure what we will do yet, but I'll do what I can to make it fun! 

Monday, May 19, 2014

Growing pains

Today, while I was at work, I received urgent messages followed by frantic calls from my husband. 
My oldest son had hit his head on the table or chair and gashed the back open. The cut was about an inch long and fairly deep. Bleeding stopped rather quickly according to my husband but after finally getting me to answer, I knew it was bad. I consulted with my dad about if it looked stitch-worthy and he said yes. 
After alerting my supervisor, I left work early. I had to keep checking my speed as I was consistently hitting the 80+ mark on the speedometer and didn't want to add a ticket to my going-downhill day. In my mind I was arguing with myself. I was angry that I wasn't able to protect my son from harm. I was understanding that I'm not a god who can't save him from all pains in life. I was upset that my husband was panicking in the face of an emergency. I don't panic. I keep calm and approach things with a level head. And while I know not everyone else does, I will get frustrated with others for their panic. 
So many thoughts and emotions flowing through me at once. It was enough to take my light headache up a notch and make me wish I could've taken the Excedrin sooner. 
As I see the wound in person, I was completely convinced that stitches would be needed. There's no getting around it for something that opened that wide. My fear and anxiety were coming alive. A mother doesn't want to see her children in pain. Especially when there's nothing you can do to take it away. And what would the doctor say? Would he accuse me of child abuse? We loaded the kids into the van and drove to the local clinic.
It took about 2 doses of pain killer to numb the spot.
About 2 hours later, he had 3 stitches and had behaved so well I wanted to cry in pride. 
My little boy is growing up. I cannot stop him from getting hurt. I cannot wrap him up in full body protective gear and expect him to enjoy life. While my heart aches at his pain, I'm going to hug him and kiss his head while I tell him that he is my little man and everything will be okay because I'm going to be there for him no matter what. 
It's a Mom thing. 

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Star Looks review and promotion information

Mother's Day is drawing near. Less than 2 weeks left to find that perfect gift. I found a great cosmetics gift idea. The StarLooks beauty box.
It's a monthly subscription box that will mail a box of cosmetic goodies for her to try out before purchasing items from online.
Each box contains 3-4 full sized products and you only pay a flat rate of $15 per month.
You can get 1 subscriptions for yourself or for someone else as a gift. StarLooks sent me the April Star Box to try out. April was a "Neutral" theme with products for all skin tones, retailing $50. It contained Tendergloss Lipstick (retail $11), "Mint" SPF Lip Balm (retail $5), "Translucent/Nude" Mineralized Powder (retail $19), and Sensation Mascara Primer (retail $15).
The mineralized powder was great! It matched my skin and looked natural unlike most foundations that can look caked on. It didn't cause any itchy feelings or irritate my face either. Really does great at keeping that "shiny" look your face gets when it's oily, away. It wasn't a powdery feeling like my old foundation. My nose wasn't twitching all day (like it normally does). This was my absolute favorite!
The mascara primer is a bit odd for me. It is supposed to protect and moisturize your lashes. I wasn't really into that. I had little pieces of white in my lashes at first. It did, however, make a difference in my lashes. They looked fuller.
The Lip Balm, I like. It has SPF in it. Living in sunny Florida we need the extra protection. It is really smooth and feels refreshing on my lips. I love the smell also.
The Tendergloss Lipstick gives your lips a fuller, glossy look. This is amazing! Makes my lips feel moisturized but doesn't have that sticky feeling that you get with most glosses and lipsticks.
I decided to show you a full look, so below is a glimpse of what these fine products have to offer!
So what else is there to know about StarLooks? Let's say you do buy a month subscription box. Perhaps there is something that you fall in love with. You can then go online to see all their products and make a purchase based on what you have tried and know for sure you love! Just that easy. Star Looks products are cruelty free. They do not test their products on animals. They are also lead and emollient free. Why else should you be interested in their products?
  • FREE shipping on all Domestic orders under 10 pounds!
  • Starlooks has a generous Points Program: 1 point for every dollar you spend in their online store.
  • They have a large selection of pro-quality make-up to choose from.
And here's another reason, they have a Special Offer going on if you refer your friends - you can get up to 3 months of free shipping. Refer a friend and have them use the phrase "give it back to" with your name in there on the referral section on the checkout page. Then you get a refund for 1 months shipping up to 3 new subscribers! So let's say you guys decide to buy based on reading my review... When you get to the checkout, find the referral box, enter "give back to Emily Vinyard". Then when you get friends who start asking how you look so amazing, refer them and have them do the same for you! Make the world a little more beautiful with a lot more happy women ;-)
Leave me a comment and tell me what you think! Also happy Mother's Day shopping!

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Scoliosis: affecting life and pregnancy

Scoliosis is a subject dear to my spine. I've had it since elementary school, though I didn't always know what it was. What is scoliosis? Its a disease within the spinal skeleton that causes the spine to grow into a curve instead of straight up and down. When I was in 1-2 grades, kids poked me in the back and laughed at my protruding shoulder blades. They referred to me as the girl with boobs in her back because basically thats what it looks like to a bunch of kids. Later, at 12 years old, I was walking through a thrift store that my mom frequented a lot. The owner was a nice elderly lady. Well, one day while walking through her store she started staring at me strangely. She came up to us and asked if I had been diagnosed with scoliosis yet. I had never even heard the word before and though my mother had, she never really noticed anything being odd. The lady pointed out some helpful hints for spotting the disease:
  1. If wearing an outfit that zips up the back - the zipper often curves to one side with more progressed cases.
  2. If a person having scoliosis bends over to touch their toes, you will see the shoulder blades protruding at various degrees. One might be higher than the other. This goes for the hips as well.
  3. While standing straight (as a person having the disease can) one side will be lower than the other. One shoulder will appear to be slouched down and standing flat footed can be impossible for more severe cases as mine was.
Well, as you can guess, a visit to the pediatrician led to a visit to a pediatric orthopedic specialist. The best in the region I believe. He was the highest ranking doctor in his field at the time. Doctor R. J. Cummings (http://www.healthgrades.com/physician/dr-robert-cummings-xsvqy). He was very patient, explained everything clearly, and most importantly he never tried to butter up the truth. He told it like it was.
My case was far from usual. First, I had a double curve or S curve. This is where the bones in the spine curve to look like one large S instead of a straight line. Secondly, when they measured the degrees of each curve (tells them how far from a normal straight line it is), I had a 52 on the top and 58 on the bottom. Those are big numbers. First question they had was, "Are you feeling any pain or discomfort?" Well, no? Back pains were never any issue for me. I felt like a normal, healthy 12 year old. The next thing they wondered is why no one noticed until it had progressed that far. Well, mom didn't really notice much as it was. And while I noticed (I got teased for it remember?), I thought it was yet another manifestation of me being oddly different from everyone else. (Which suited me just fine since I enjoyed being the odd one that never fit in anyhow.)


So what does this mean? Well, when you have a more severe case like mine chances are slim that you can get by with a body brace. Mild cases that require treatment but not surgery, can be treated with the use of a body brace that straightens the torso and keeps a person in a rigid position until the bones are taught to grow in a straight line again or until they stop growing altogether. Moms sometimes love this idea for teaching their kids how to sit straight. Ever have your mom say, "Sit up straight! Don't slouch!" Body braces keep you straight whether you like it or not!


For my case and similiar cases, this wouldn't work. I was growing still and at a rate of 2 degrees a month I think it was, it wouldn't have taken much longer for me to end up in a wheel chair paralyzed and in constant pain. Surgery was needed as soon as possible. I began donating my own blood towards my surgery. 1 pint a month for 4 month. Its the safest way and provides for the better healing experience since a body is used to its own blood rather than having to be introduced to someone elses.
The surgery is called Spinal Fusion. For milder curves, 1 rod will be attached or fused to the bones with a few screws. As the bone grows, it follows the shape of the rod ensuring that it stays straight. For a case like mine, 2 rods were needed. The rods were fused with 4 clamps (2 on each side) and lots of screws. I was quite tall with a long torso though. The first surgery I had (out of 3) was done later the same year I was diagnosed. It went very well. Recovery included some strict rules for the next 6 months.
  1. No bending.
  2. No heavy lifting.
  3. No twisting or turning.
  4. No jumping (really is a bummer when you love trampolines and jump ropes).
  5. No strenuous activities that could put pressure or stress on the spine.
I learned to do a lot of things differently. I learned to pick up things with my feet since I couldn't bend. My legs grew stronger since I had to squat down to pick things up if they were too heavy or awkward to get with my feet. I learned to like the couch since I couldn't sleep in my own bed comfortably for quite some time. I got used to having my mother come and help me bathe since I could only stand there and get the front of me. For someone who enjoyed her independence, it was a trial and half.
At 15 years old, I'm having pains in my lower spine. So when I go for another check up, they take a closer look at my X-rays. I find out that a screw had broken and was needing to be replaced because the curve was starting to grow again. Thus started the jokes about bionic girl needing her bolts tightened.... Normally a girl stops growing when she starts her menstrual cycle. May I point out, I'm not normal. I was still growing even though I should have been done 4 years before. Either the growing bone broke the hardware or the hardware broke allowing me to grow sideways again. So, surgery 2 commenced.
All was well for the next 3 years. In between surgeries I developed arthritis in my lower back and hips. This is normal when something metal is installed in the human body. Its often noticed when the weather changes. You feel it in your bones that a storm is coming, that rain is on the way. Just before I turned 18, I started having some pretty strong pain. Thinking that something might have broken again, we went in to check up on it. Everything appeared normal. X-rays showed nothing broken or damaged, blood and urine tests came back normal, and even the bone scan showed nothing out of the ordinary. I also had no fevers indicating infection, but then I don't think I've ever had an infection. Doctor Cummings decided to take the hardware out. I prepared for surgery #3.
It was only after he opened me up and took out all that metal that he found a severe infection eating away at the bones in my lower spine. During the operation, a PICC line was inserted. A PICC line is a peripherally inserted central catheter. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peripherally_inserted_central_catheterIts used to administer antibiotics over an extended period. The line was inserted in my right arm peripheral Cephalic vein, ran across my chest, and ended directly in my heart for optimal deliverance of the antibiotics. The original strand of infection was not easily diagnosed so I was released from the hospital with a temporary antibiotic that they later changed when the culture came back. For the next 9 months, I once again followed the strict rules, but I also had to be trained to give myself the required antibiotics to kill the infection. They had to be administered everyday, twice a day for 9 months non-stop. It was interesting going to work and having co-workers stare or shudder as I unrolled the outer line and started the long process in the break room. Its a multi-step process that can take about 10 minutes to complete.


  • First you clean the insertion part.
  • Then you flush the line with saline solution to clear out any blood that may have flowed into the tube.
  • Next you put in the antibiotic (always checking to make sure air bubbles are out first). This one was the slowest part.
  • Next came another dose of saline solution. This stuff gives you a very cold feeling as it runs up your arm and across the chest.
  • Finally you put in the heparin lock to seal everything in place. It always gave me a bitter metallic taste in my mouth.


After everything was settled from the final surgery, the doc released me with a clean bill of health. He told me I could live a normal life and do pretty much anything that anyone else could. (Military didn't agree though.) The one warning he did offer was this: getting pregnant and having a natural birth may be difficult for me. I'm not 100% straight in the spine. My shoulder blades still protrude more than normal and my hips are not in perfect alignment with each other. One hip sticks out  farther.
Getting pregnant hasn't been the problem. I've got the 3rd bun in the oven right now. The pregnancies themselves, however, have had their very difficult moments. My first son was pretty smooth sailing until the end. Towards the end I had a lot of back pain. But then.... I also gained 45 pounds with him and had a lot of water weight gain that made everything hurt. My second son was harder. Even at the very beginning there were days when I could barely walk and I had to quit my job because of the pain getting to be too much. This third one has been the hardest of all.
When you have scoliosis, your spine doesn't curve and change like it should. When you have the spinal fusion operations, you are stuck ram rod straight. You never change or curve besides the normal bending over or tilting to the side. With exercize, you should be able to train your back to become quite flexible though. But during pregnancy, your spine won't accomodate the baby the way it needs to. My babies seek to curl up on my lower spine pinching the nerve and causing severe pain. If I move in just a certain way, it causes me to freeze up and begin to fall. Simple things like bending, walking or even driving hurts. Another problem during pregnancy that a scoliosis patient might face - not being able to breathe well. Since there is no room and things are crammed up anyway, your lungs may not be able to expand as well as they do normally. You find yourself out of breath doing simple tasks or even while walking.
I've done a lot of research on these things. I've seen many different doctors and gotten many different suggestions for pregnancy and labor issues.
  • When you are not pregnant, exercize regularly. Build up the muscle strength in your back. It helps strengthen the bones. Doing sit ups, crunches, and weight lifting can help.
  • Take calcium supplements. Build up the nutrients in your bones.
  • During pregnancy, keep as active as you can without pushing your limits. Ask your doctor what they think is best for you since everyone is different.
  • Water exercizes are always the best! It supports your extra weight and takes a load off. I like just floating in the water sometimes.
  • If you are having trouble breathing, relax. Straighten up and stretch out.
  • Some people have the option of physical therapy. For someone like me, this is not so much of option. Most health care providers see me as a liability and don't want to take a chance on me trying something and getting worse.
  • Tylenol is about the only over the counter medicine you can take for pain. I don't suggest you take it too often though. It is a blood thinner.
  • Heating pads are wonderful! So are hot showers and hot baths. Heat therapy soothes the muscles and relaxes you.
  • Maternity belts can be helpful as well. They offer extra support under the belly and around the back.
  • Discuss labor options with your healthcare provider. I couldn't lay on my back for very long. It was excrutiatingly painful. So for my second sons birth I had a midwife and gave birth at home. I endured the pains while walking around and standing in the shower in intervals.
  • But no matter what - take it easy! If you have someone who can help you when things get tough, I strongly advise you to ask them.
I hope someone finds this information useful. Or at least learned something. Scoliosis affects so many people in so many ways. Chances are you know someone who has at least a mild case even if they don't realize it.