Thursday, February 12, 2015

I've come a long way...

I've been cleaning up and going through stuff. I've got a move or two to get ready for in this upcoming year. Going through pictures and packing them away, I got to glimpse my life in stages. To see my personal history in still frames, really puts it all in perspective. It renews the hopes I had for a brighter future. Some of the most memorable parts of my life's adventures, are in these photos below. I encourage you to look back and see how far you've come. No matter what you don't like now, find the things that you do like. Have you grown stronger? Wiser? Gained a special skill? Are you getting where you want to be? 

About this time, 17 years ago, I went under the knife for my first spinal fusion. I felt like a huge weight had been put on shoulders. I could move, but it was all stiff. There were nights when my pain was excruciating but I could barely move myself off the couch that had become my bed. Crying myself to sleep, I learned what true pain was. I also learned to manage it. To be stronger. It takes a lot to make me cry these days. Even more to make me turn to pain killers for relief. 

My next major life change was the day I become a mother. Since my spine is fused, I can't have an epidural. And considering how small a woman I am... I felt EVERYTHING. But my screams of pain were soon replaced with tears of sheer joy. I couldn't hold my little boy at first since I lost so much blood that I could only lay there shaking. But he was truly the most beautiful creature I'd ever seen. I'd take that pain again any time to relive that moment. 
Now I'm a mother of three. I work a full time job, juggle life, and strive to stay ahead of the chaos. I have a long way to go to reach the dream I currently have. But I'm taking it a step at a time. 

2 comments:

  1. Very touching. Your daughter looks so much like you. I look at Ava and she is turning into quite the chunk these days. Haha. We do have to live every moment because once they are gone...they are gone forever. I have so many kids who are on the way out the door. Babies no more. It was a short time they were my little ones.

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    1. Thank you! I had you to guide me along. Ava is such a darling little girl. She makes me smile every time I look at her!

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