About this time, 17 years ago, I went under the knife for my first spinal fusion. I felt like a huge weight had been put on shoulders. I could move, but it was all stiff. There were nights when my pain was excruciating but I could barely move myself off the couch that had become my bed. Crying myself to sleep, I learned what true pain was. I also learned to manage it. To be stronger. It takes a lot to make me cry these days. Even more to make me turn to pain killers for relief.
My next major life change was the day I become a mother. Since my spine is fused, I can't have an epidural. And considering how small a woman I am... I felt EVERYTHING. But my screams of pain were soon replaced with tears of sheer joy. I couldn't hold my little boy at first since I lost so much blood that I could only lay there shaking. But he was truly the most beautiful creature I'd ever seen. I'd take that pain again any time to relive that moment.
Very touching. Your daughter looks so much like you. I look at Ava and she is turning into quite the chunk these days. Haha. We do have to live every moment because once they are gone...they are gone forever. I have so many kids who are on the way out the door. Babies no more. It was a short time they were my little ones.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I had you to guide me along. Ava is such a darling little girl. She makes me smile every time I look at her!
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