Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Strengthening Relationship Foundations

Why does time speed up when your to-do list feels so long?! We are currently taking premarital counseling as a requirement before getting married. I went into it begrudgingly. No offense to anyone who believes in it, but I hadn't seen success in others that utilized such services. That, and it was draining our reserve money as well. Plus, it takes time away from other things we have going on. We are required to have 5 sessions of 1.5 hours long and it costs $90 a session. You do the math. But I considered it something I would approach open-mindedly. After all, I want this marriage to be strong in its foundations. To truly last. One failed marriage and rocky divorce is more than enough for me. I don't want any more. And I know we both come together with our personal issues.
The first two sessions have been great. I was steeled against the bombardment of questions and provocation that I believed counselors were all about. Turns out... I was wrong. As a matter of fact, even with just these 2 sessions, my fiancĂ© and I have begun to talk more and be a little more open about things. Okay, more so me. I don't like to "complain" about things. Or tell him when I'm bothered by something. Don't know why, but I prefer to keep everything bottled up. Especially when I know there is nothing he or I can do about it. That's what my journal is for, right? Yeah... no. I clam up. I shut down. Emotions go out the window. I become... robotic? Bugs the daylights out of him. No matter how hard I try, that's my defense. Its the wall I put up. I am getting better about it.

Counseling has helped. It was a requirement that I now feel should be given to all. It should be embraced. Especially when you are planning to unlock the Lifetime Partner achievement. (We totally plan to have the minister hold one of these up at the end of the ceremony!)
We still have a long way to go. Both of us, however, have faith that no matter what the future holds, we will go through the remainder of our lives together. We will weather the storms and make the best of everything. Together.

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